Bay County, FL to be renamed eBay County

By Thomas Stellung

Panama City Beach, FL | Mon Jan 10, 2010 4:59pm

(REPREAL) - Recent negative stories clouding the reputation of Bay County, FL, after a shooting at a school board meeting in December has prompted community leaders to accept a long-standing offer by eBay to rename the county.

The agreement is a ten-year, $100 million dollar offer that officially renames Bay County as eBay County.  Final approval came after a 7-0 vote by the county commissioners with support from the mayor of Panama City Beach. 

"Hallelujah! Our debt worries are finally over! Plus, it will be an easy transition as we simply add a lower case 'e' to all county buildings and signs," crowed Cecilia Benton, 54, long-time County Commisioner, as she heralded the new era.  "AAA has promised to help in 2011 by printing travel maps with eBay County instead of Bay County."

"We are sending out millions of lower case 'e' print outs to other counties in Florida.  This can be a fun school project for elementary school students, a way to keep errant youth preoccupied, and an engaging challenge for the growing elderly population throughout the Sunshine State!"

"We have always owned Bay county," bragged eBay spokesperson Jill Moore, 27. "eBay operates the most auctions in Bay County.  We have assisted locally in the selling of gently used clothing, pre-owned cars, Hummel figurines, and foreclosed homes."

Once the county and city charters can be amended, eBay plans to auction off immediately the elected positions.